The Partners Point of View

1,2,3,4........28,29,30.... kick ....gasp for air, snore....silence...bed shake, bed shake, chest caving in, kick, gasp, loud snore....repeat over and over....

This is how I spend my time "sleeping." I have sleep apnea... but not the kind that would show up if I was tested... My poor sweet Brad is the real sufferer.

Being the person that shares a bed with sleep apnea sufferer (SAS) is no walk in the park. The snoring is unbelievable. I think you could hear him outside in the backyard. I'm amazed the neighbors don't complain! Brad has another great attribute to his SA. His chest caves in while he is trying to breath, this caving makes the bed shake... so every few seconds bed shake, snore, bed shake, snore...my own personal vibrating bed I guess!

Brad falls asleep almost instantaneously. So putting his C-PAP machine on- not happening. He hates that thing, and who wouldn't- do you want to sleep with a mask on? Sounds so comfy! So here beings another nighttime ritual. Shake, shake, shake.. "Brad wake up, put your mask on." grumble grumble, roll over, back to sleep- repeat far too many times until he is finally awake enough or willing to put that darn thing on- some days I just say forget about it and either vacate to the couch or somehow fall asleep amongst the noise. (There are the amazing days when I come to bed and he is already asleep, mask in place!)

The mask- lets talk about sleeping with someone wearing a C-PAP mask.... do you know that thing not only blows air in but out as well... so who do you think that air hits- oh me...falling asleep while cool air is continuously blowing in your face, just fantastic.

And the hissing- it is just white noise, oh whatever...CHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH......

Then there is the humming- the my mask is on my face but something isn't sealed right so it is just going to hum and hum loudly hum! And can I fix this hum- oh no. The second I touch that mask guess who is rolling over. And will he wake up to fix it himself- another big NOPE!

So you would think well at least the humming, hissing, or blowing air is better then the snoring and bed shaking... oh that stuff still doesn't go away... sometimes yes it does, or at least it lessens it... but most of the time it is still there.

I've often thought to myself, we are going to be that old couple that has their own rooms. The idea of that breaks my heart. And sometimes I fear we will never get to be that old couple because of the health risks that come along with severe sleep apnea.

So the search for a better solution was on.... Dental appliance, oh the run around, who, where, what INS covers it. Just a useless waste of time. Then the ENT, maybe tonsils taken out. More sleep studies, pressure and masks changed out, rejection from ENT....google searches... an idea- MMA- Maxillomandibular Advancement.

The short of MMA- break your top and bottom jaw bones, move them forward, wire your mouth shut for 6 weeks, long slow recovery but tada- a bigger airway, the ability to breath, and bye bye sleep apnea!

SOLD!

Oh what, I'm not the one that has to go through the pain so I can't choose? But I still choose SOLD! Can I pull out the "I have been pregnant for 27 months and delivered 3 babies" card? You can handle this pain!

Really Brad was kinda sold off the bat too... obviously we did a lot of research and knew going into this all the risks, pain, and time involved. But the improvement on his quality of life just seems to out weigh the cons.

It took a lot of time and Dr appts to get to where we are now- and where is that you may ask- oh it is 9 days away from surgery. There are not any local Drs who perform this procedure. And to be approved you have to go through a round of tests. I think from his 1st appt until surgery on the 11th he will have had 7 appointments. All of them being rather long.

So here we are in the pre-op home stretch.

I see an end to sleep apnea in sight.... I know this is going to be a long recovery and a ton of work and pain but I am hopeful. I am hopeful for Brad to have a life outside of masks, medications, dragging himself out of bed dead tired, and sleepwalking through his life.

So here is my MMA survival journal...the partners point of view...

to be continued......